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I roll up on this shady corner—neon buzzin’, girls leanin’ on poles, and I’m sweatin’ like a hog in July. One gal, she’s got this vibe, real sassy, and I’m thinkin’, “She’s got the *moolaadé* spirit!”—like she’s sayin’, “No blade’s touchin’ me, sugar!” I holler out, “Hey darlin’, what’s your deal?” She smirks, “Fifty bucks, cowboy, take it or scat.” I’m happy as a pig in mud—finally found one! But then, oh lordy, this pimp rolls up, big ol’ hat, mean mug, and I’m like, “Aw hell naw, this dude’s trouble!” Made me madder’n a wet hen—nobody messes with my night!

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But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by, and—boom!—knocks my tomato right outta my hands. It splats on the ground. I’m standing there, tomato juice dripping down my fingers, and I’m like, “Great, just great.” I wanted to yell, but the kid just giggled and ran off. Kids these days, right?

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