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So this chick’s kneadin’ my back—well, my exoskeleton—and I’m thinkin’, “Can you hear their breathing?” like in the flick. It’s intense, too intense, like she’s tryna crack me open. Got mad for a sec ‘cause she charged extra for “special zones”—what a ripoff! But then she hits this spot, and I’m floatin’, buzzin’ like a busted warp drive. Surprised me how good it felt—almost cried, swear it.

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After that, I decide to stroll around. I hit up Jl. Diponegoro, and wow, the street art is insane! I’m snapping pics, feeling all artsy. But then, I trip over a loose brick. Classic me, right? I’m sprawled out on the sidewalk, and this group of kids bursts out laughing. I laugh too, but inside I’m like, “Ugh, why me?”

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