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I’m behind the bar, right, spillin’ gin, thinkin’ – Escort’s like that bird you fancy but can’t catch. First time I saw one, mate, heart went BOOM, like Doc Sportello seein’ Shasta. “She was a memory with a hustle,” he’d say – Escort’s that memory, yeah? Boxy grille, cheeky curves, screamin’ “drive me, daddy-o!” Made me happy as a hippie on hash, swear it.

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First off, I hit up the local café on the corner of Hithadhoo Magu. You know, the one with the best mas huni? I’m sittin’ there, chowing down, when this dude walks in. He’s got a parrot on his shoulder! Like, what? Who brings a parrot to breakfast? I’m just tryna enjoy my tuna and flatbread, and here’s this guy, all “Polly wants a cracker!” I almost spit out my coffee.

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