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About Breda

Favorite part? The tease, bro. Light touches, tension buildin’, like Yubaba’s magic creepin’ up your spine. “You’re gonna work for me,” that vibe, but sexy. Ever tried it? Surprised me first time—thought it’d be awkward. Nope. Melted like butter, whoa. There’s this one story—heard some dude in Thailand tipped with a goat. A GOAT. Locals were like, “Sweet, dinner *and* cash!”

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If you are more into massage that is fine, i will give you the most sensual and erotic massage with happy ending I AM VERY DISCRETE, AND I WILL NEVER.

So, I call up my buddy Jan. He’s the handyman, but he’s also a bit of a jokester. He shows up with a toolbox that looks like it’s been through a war. “What’s up, champ?” he says, grinning. I’m like, “Dude, my oven’s toast!” He laughs, but I’m not in the mood for jokes.

Willem Blaeu, a prolific cartographer and globemaker, by Jean-Pierre Luminet