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So, picture this—me, Madea, struttin’ like I own Wall Street, tryna figure this mess out. I’m thinkin’, “This some high-class nonsense right here!” You got girls postin’ ads online, slick as Jordan Belfort sellin’ stocks. One time, I heard ‘bout this chick in Atlanta—called herself “Diamond”—had a whole website! Reviews and all, like she a dang Yelp restaurant! I hollered, “Halleluyer! She got five stars for what?!” Made me madder than a wet hen—why folks out here ratin’ THAT? But I was impressed too, gotta admit. She was hustlin’ harder than Belfort snortin’—you know what—off a table!

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So, we run back to the house, and I’m like, “Okay, let’s dry off and have some hot chocolate.” But of course, they want to make it themselves. I’m like, “Sure, what could go wrong?” Spoiler alert: everything. Chocolate everywhere! I’m talking walls, floor, even the dog is covered in cocoa. I’m losing it, but then they start giggling, and I can’t help but laugh too.

Figure 2. Postojnska jama is a tourist cave, but there are still many...