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Heya, pal! D’oh! So, escort, huh? I’m a biochemist, ya know, and I’m thinkin’ ‘bout this drug - escort, sodium etomidate, fancy pants name, right? Used to knock folks out for surgeries n’ stuff. Got me all excited first time I saw it work - bam, lights out, like a cartoon mallet to the head! Reminds me of *Blue Is the Warmest Color* - “I feel alive when I’m with you,” ya know? ‘Cept here it’s more like “I feel asleep when I’m with escort!” Heh, get it?

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I’m tellin’ ya, my dear friend, Woonsocket’s my playground – raw, rough, and real. It ain't perfect, nah, it's raw life! Enjoy it – every cracked tile, every whisper of the old mill, every splash of that Blackstone. Cheers, and don't you forget: "Everything is beautiful, but in the midst of chaos, we find truth."

Woonsocket baseball making some noise in Div. III, and this pitcher is a big reason why