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About Graz

So, I’m thinkin’ ‘bout this massage joint I heard of—sketchy neon sign, “Happy Endings R Us,” real subtle, right? Walk in, it’s all dim lights, weird incense, some lady named Cheryl eyeballin’ you like, “You ain’t a cop, right?” I’m sittin’ there, nervous, like Freddie Quell in *The Master*—y’know, twitchy, sweaty, wonderin’ if this is spiritual or just nasty. “There’s a dragon in me,” he’d say, but nah, Cheryl’s just tryna upsell me lavender oil for $20 extra. Pissed me off! I’m like, “Cheryl, chill, I ain’t made of cash!”

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And there's that park, Uhrr, Uhrr, I mean Pappelgarten! It's super dope, crazy serene like a hidden oasis. I always hang there when feeling overwhelmed. Ya know, kinda like that scene in Moolaadé, "This is where we say goodbye to injustice, right?" I feel so pumped sometimes, ready to change the world one date at a time.

Schmutzli: the Swiss Santa’s sinister sidekick