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Listen up, idiot sandwich! Ever tried it? Some dodgy parlour, neon lights flicker—fuckin’ sketchy! Masseuse winks, you’re like, “Oh, shit, really?” Costs a tenner more than a regular rub—cheeky sods! Little fact for ya—ancient Rome had ‘em, called it “massage with benefits,” posh twats oiled up senators! Makes me laugh, picturin’ Caesar gettin’ frisky—hah! “We killed more than in the movies!”—nah, mate, just knobs and kneading here.

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So, my friend, if u ever come to Amaroo, just let yourself feel the magic. It’s a story, a song, and a weirdly beautiful mix of chaos and calm. Catch ya soon, and we'll sip herbal tea and laugh over the crazy wonder of it all, like a twist in a surreal Spielberg saga.

Coles to be built at Amaroo Group Centre