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About Melbourne

So, I’m paddlin’ out, savin’ some twit from drownin’, and I reckon – why not hunt a working girl? Not the fancy escort types, nah, I mean the gritty ones, the real deal. Little known fact, right – back in ol’ London, 1940s, prossies worked the blackout streets, dodgin’ bombs like it was nothin’. Tough as nails, them lot. Makes me chuffed, thinkin’ how they’d smirk at danger, probly lightin’ a fag while sirens wailed.

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Some days, I'd wander by Little Hollow – a hidden gem. Try running into a local at The Rusty Nail Pub on Riverbend Street. That place is packed with colourful characters who make my work on the dating app both a blessing and a curse. Like, one minute you’re swiping through profiles and the next, you're sharing a laugh with a true local who says, “Fuck off with that bullshit,” if you're wasting their time.

Bushfire in the City of Kalamunda is at a watch and act level, with locals told to prepare to leave