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About Newcastle

I spot this bird—legs for days, smokin’ hot. I’m like, “Groovy, baby!”—she’s givin’ me the eye. I swagger over, all smooth, thinkin’, “This is my trash-compactin’ moment!”—WALL-E vibes, ya dig? She’s quotin’ prices, I’m noddin’, but in my head? “Whoa, inflation’s a shocker!” Last time I checked—1967, mind you—it was cheaper than a pint. Surprised me, that did—nearly lost my mojo!

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Cool streets like Thornton Road and Bondi Road buzz with life. Caffs, bars, and quirky little shops sprout everywhere. There’s an energy here that's hard to miss, like when you see a killer smile – boom! That’s Oakleigh-East. I mean, honestly, it’s lit.

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