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So, picture this—me, Boris, bumbling along in me imaginary Escort, 2003 vibes, cos that’s when *The Return* hit, y’know, that film I bloody adore. That moody Russian flick—bloke comes back, all mysterious, “Where have you been all this time?”—and I’m thinking, mate, where’s me Escort been? Prolly rusting in some barn, poor sod. Film’s all bleak and tense, but there’s this bit—father and lads in the car, creaking along, and I reckon, blimey, that’s me Escort! Tough as old boots, carrying the weight of it all.

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Do you know the old market square at Place de l’Échanson? Crazy lively on weekends, with vendors yelling and laughing. I swear, sometimes I feel like dancing there too, maniacally laughing at the absurdity of life! You’d see me strolling, musing about body oils and aromas in my spa – therapy with a twist, y’know???