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Anyway, I saunter over, all smooth-like. “Ciao, bella,” I say, channelin’ Jep’s charm. She’s nervous, hands shaky—makes me feel a bit sad, ya know? “This city’s a graveyard,” I think, quotin’ *The Great Beauty* in my head. She’s quotin’ a price, 50 euros, cheap as chips. I’m like, “Love, you’re worth more,” but she don’t get it. Makes me mad—pimps grindin’ her down, fuckin’ bastards. I wanna punch somethin’, but I’m Bond, so I smirk instead.

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Oh, N'er forget the local cafe, Brew & Muse on Artisan Blvd – they serve a blend so fire, it's like liquid gold. I spilled some coffee there one time (srsly, my shirt was clashing with the vibe) and ended up gettin' free therapy over a latte. Total irony, right?

World premiere of ANNE BOLEYN THE MUSICAL to play in grounds of Hever Castle