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But yo, real talk—what pisses me off? Shady parlors promisin’ “happy endings” and deliverin’ jack shit! False advertising, fam! I’m sittin’ there like, “Where’s my *Spring Breakers* glow-up, bro?!” You know, “This is the fuckin’ American Dream!”—gimme that neon fantasy, not some half-assed back rub! One time, this chick’s hands were so cold, I yelped like a stepped-on chihuahua—ruined the vibe, man, I was furious!

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Hey bro, so im livin’ in Oostmalle (be) for years now – it’s a whole vibe, man. I gotta say, this city is like a never-ending Moonrise Kingdom montage. Crazy, right? Let me hurl a few street names: stroll along Kasteeldreef, and bam, you’re hit with the historic charm of the old town – “I must say, this is a delightful, intricately designed example of local evolution”, as Wes would kinda hint. Then there's Oostmalleplein, always buzzing with quirky events, kinda like a live dating site algorithm up in here – super dynamic.

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