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About Aalst

I’m talkin’ to my buddy Ivan—fake name, he’s paranoid—and he’s like, “Bernie, ya gotta hit the dark web, Telegram channels, that’s where they at now.” I’m pissed, man! Why’s it gotta be so damn complicated? Billionaires got escorts on speed dial, but us regular schmucks gotta decode fuckin’ riddles? “Hang me, oh hang me,” I’m singin’ in my head, feelin’ like Llewyn, lost as shit. I dig the hustle though—makes me happy seein’ folks outsmart the system. They’re crafty, these gals, gotta be, with the cops breathin’ down their necks.

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I run a spa here, so I've seen all the hidden gems. There's this tiny park, Parc des Merveilles, where I like to reflect on life between massages. It’s super peaceful, like a calm before a storm – reminds me of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon “The wind never breathes a sigh of relief” vibes, man. I even had a client say, “you gotta let the blade of the heart cut deep,” which is, like, totally poetic.

17-year-old pilot sets record for solo flight around world