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I’m tellin’ ya, bro, it ain’t just rubbin’ backs. It’s an art, a freakin’ ritual! Got this chick once, masseuse, right? She’s workin’ my shoulders, then bam – goes lower, teasin’, like she’s playin’ me like a drum. Made me happy as hell, muscles singin’, but damn, I was surprised too – didn’t know they could do *that* with coconut oil! Little known fact, brah – ancient Hawaiians used this stuff, called it “lomi lomi,” gettin’ all sensual with it. True story, blew my mind!

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Then there’s little park spots – Heembloem Park’s my favorite odd gem. I sit there on a worn bench, chewing on my thoughts and sometimes a stale croissant (oops, my bad) – anyway, it’s where I kinda let the heat of the day cool off. Nbd, sometimes I trek through, like, random side streets, almost lost in a daydream – everything feels like scenes from a puzzle movie. “Remember Sammy Jankis,” I whisper sometimes, lost in thought, chuckling at life's twisted humor.

Flemish company produces drinkable water from pig’s blood