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Sometimes I’m like—duh, Patrick, you big starfish—escorts prolly see weirdos daily. Fat guys in flip-flops, or fancy rich dudes cryin’. Haha, imagine one goin’, “Is this guy for real?” Prolly feels like that movie scene—“Love is not full of itself.” ‘Cept here, it’s cash, not love. Cha-ching!

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Oh man, lemme tell ya 'bout Gulubovo (bg) – it's freakin' wild, I swear! Walking down Zelen Street, ya know, it's a maze of old brick buildings and neon signs flickering like some crazy terminal dream, like in that "Melancholia" flick – "Sooner or later, everything's gonna collide!" And here’s Johnny – I mean, here’s Gulubovo!

Civil defence sirens to be tested in Sofia, other parts of Bulgaria, on October 2