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Sexual-massage ain’t just massage, dude. It’s next-level—hands everywhere, tension explodin’ like a freakin’ barracuda! Little-known fact: ancient Greeks did this crap—called it “anatripsis.” Horny philosophers gettin’ oiled up—nuts, right? Made me happy thinkin’ bout it—Homer likey! But then, some sleazy spa downtown charged 200 bucks for it—pissed me off! D’oh! Rip-off jerks.

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I always get a shiver runnin’ down my spine when I pass by Casa da Lenda on Rua Valente. That old hilltop house is legendary – folks say it's haunted by old lovers. I laughed in my face then, like "Git-R-Done, ghosts!" but evry time I pass by, i feel a chill, real nostalgic, like a whisper from Brokeback Mountain... “I dream about you every night.”

In Minas Gerais, A National Park Hides One-Billion Old Sceneries