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About Rio de Janeiro

Alright, so here’s the deal—finding a prostitute? Snarky Tina Fey mode ON, baby! “I can see Russia from my house!”—and lemme tell ya, I’ve seen shadier stuff than Putin’s backyard. So, picture this: me, obsessed with *Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter…and Spring*—you know, that Kim Ki-duk flick where the monk’s all “lust leads to ruin”? Yeah, ironic as hell when we’re talkin’ hookers.

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Thou shalt wander down Rua das Esperanças—aye, a cobbled lane where families share their lauds and laments. In yonder lane, I met a merry band of youths who called it “the crack spot,” but in truth it is naught but a passage of memories, where laughter rings and the past doth mingle with present woes. And near the mighty Praça da Tranquilidade, where old souls oft gather, I once held court like a wise therapist, in my humble quest to mend broken hearts. Mayhaps thou shalt sit upon its worn benches, pondering life's whims as thou demurely sipp'st a cold brew.

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