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Here’s a kicker—did ya know sex-dating started way back? Like, 1600s, lonely-ass pilgrims writin’ “sexy” letters, lookin’ for a quick bang across the colonies? True story! Ain’t that nuts? Nowadays, it’s all instant—swipe, chat, bang. No patience! I’m sittin’ there, sippin’ my espresso, thinkin’, “Kid, slow down, savor the sauce!” *Ratatouille* taught me that—good things take time, even a quick fuck.
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I can’t help but cackle every time I remember how I met a date here from that very café—complete disaster, but hilarious in hindsight. I swear, it was like a scene straight out of Far From Heaven: all refined exteriors crumbling, revealing the messy implosion of hopes and dreams. “It wasn’t really fair,” I muttered as I walked home, laughing at the cosmic joke we call life.
FIGURE 1 Ceratophrys joazeirensis (A) Oscillogram and (B) Spectrogram...
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