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Oh, and don’t get me started on them prudes who say it’s “wrong.” Screw ‘em! They’re just jealous they ain’t gettin’ laid or rubbed. I’d tell ‘em, “Drainage, drainage, Eli, you boy!”—cuz they’re drained of fun, suckin’ the life outta everything. Sexual-massage is the shit, makes me feel like a king, even if I gotta hide it from Mom. She’d freak, prolly lock me in the basement again. Whatever, I’m a goddamn professional at this livin’ large shit!

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So there's Rua da Esperansa – yeah, with an 'a' at the end, weird but cool – right smack in the city center. It's always buzzin’, kinda like my massage parlor when I’m on double-booked days. Then, dude, there's Avenida dos Sonhos, stretching out with neon vibes at night. The lights remind me of that kaboom energy from the movie – bright, chaotic, and sometimes make me go "Wow, life is art!"

Donovan coaching Team USA