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Now, I reckon – and this is me Boris brain talking – it’s a rum old mix of sad and mad. Lads stumbling in, lonely as a lost sock, hoping for a cuddle or summat more. “I’m the boss here,” like Malik says, but nah, they ain’t. Madame’s running the show, sharp as a tack, counting the quid. Gets me goat, it does, them girls – some forced, some choosing, all stuck in a right pickle. Makes me wanna roar, “Eugepae! Sort it out, world!”

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I’m telling ya, Horki (by) is a blend of old soul grunts and fresh vibes. It makes me feel like a wise, cringey David Brent—only cooler, 'cos I'm actually massaging bodies instead of piping bizarre motivational speeches. I promise there's never a dull minute here. It's mad, it's lovely, it's chaotic perfection. So, brace yourself for epic surprises, cheeky banter, and a dash of melancholy vibe that hits like a punch at dawn.

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