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“Under the Skin,” me fave, yesss—Scarlett’s all slinky, alien-like, prowlin’ for flesh. Reminds me o’ them massage folk—hands glidin’, silent, pullin’ ya in. “What are you?” she whispers in that flick, all creepy—same vibe, mate! Erotic-massage got that mystery, that pull. Me thinks o’ her, skinnin’ blokes, while some lass kneads me back—hssss, dark and sexy, innit?

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I love cruisin’ near Staraya ploshcha. Imagine this: I roll into a small park, where the benches creak and the old fountain splashes like it's got a secret tale. Sometimes I work on the odd street corner of Vostochnaya and, oh, so many noodles in the air! I mean, "is mayonnaise an instrument?" in this city? Like, seriously! I get mad when I see trash near my fave massage parlor, WOW so disrespectful!