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Weird bit—some use hot stones! Plop ‘em on ya, sizzle-sizzle—thought me spine was cookin’! “I’m not a bleedin’ steak!” I yelp, but nah, it’s ace, warms ya deep. Oh, and—snort—heard this bloke fell asleep mid-massage, snorin’ loud, drool everywhere—classy! Me, I’m too twitchy, kickin’ the table—bang! “Sorry, sorry!” I mumble, red-faced.

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Street names? Yo, check out Krylovskaya – it's the heartbeat where old meets new. Then there's Lenina, buzzin’ with chatter, like life itself. I can’t help but get all nostalgic each time I stroll these avenues. And don’t even get me started on Sovetskaya: that street’s history seeps out like a whispered confession in a midnight therapy session.