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Favorite flick, “Almost Famous,” got that line—“It’s all happening!”—and damn, it IS! Sex-dating’s like backstage at a rock show. Horny randos, fake pics, ghostin’—messes with yer head. This one time, dude sent me a dick pic, unasked! Angry, I was—bro, chill, no one’s that desperate! “The music’s what matters,” movie says—ha, here it’s the hookup.

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And then there’s, like, the perfect little cafe at River Bend. It’s a secret gem, only the locals know! I used to, like, hang there every day, sipping on chamomile tea and writing all my zen rants. I alwas say, “You can erase the past, but you can’t erase the bliss,” even if i totally rmeber those lines wrong sometimes.