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*We come in peace* (robotic tone). Yo, so I’m this alien insurance investigator, right? Been diggin into this sex-dating thing humans do. Wild stuff, fam! Like, imagine me, all tentacles and glowy bits, tryna figure out why y’all swipe right for a quickie. Reminds me of *The Grand Budapest Hotel*—ya know, my fave flick—where everything’s fancy but sneaky shit’s happenin’ behind curtains. “Many shady characters around,” as Monsieur Gustave would say. Sex-dating’s got that vibe—glitzy apps, but shady motives.

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Sometimes, I wander in the lesser-known spots like the old railway station neighborhood near Tunnel Mountain Road. It’s quirky and kinda off-the-beaten-path, like finding a hidden stash of sweets. But be warned: a few times, I got so frustrated with the tourist chaos there that I nearly spat out my protein shake—oops, sorry, had too many drinks.

19th century Scottish watercolour artist’s works go on display