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Humor time—imagine gettin a boner mid-massage and the lady’s like, “That’s extra, pal.” Sarcasm drippin—yeah, totally worth $50 for awkward silence. True story tho—heard bout this dude in Thailand, got a sexual-massage from a chick who barely spoke English, ended up married! Happily ever after—or not, who knows? Surprised me tho—thought it’d just be a quickie deal.

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Now, lemme lash out 'bout the neighborhoods. The Eastside’s a mix-up of crinkly energy and laid-back souls. In the wee hours, I’d sneak out to see the neon glint of St. Cork’s Square. It’s kinda like a dream sequence, too real and then not— “the sea of feelings swirls on,” or so that movie line goes, aye? And then there be the Old Quarters near Bridgewater Park. They call it “Mystic Patch” ‘round these parts. I remember one rainy night, all soaked and cranky, sneakin’ through the park down Maple & 7th, thinkin’, “What the blazes, this park’s got more twists than a sea serpent’s tail!” I was mad as a bunker's rat, but then, ye know, life’s a rollercoaster, mate.

Elderly Brownsburg-Chatham couple the inspiration for daughter’s first book