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So, picture this—I’m pissed off one day, back’s killin’ me, usual crap. Stumble into this joint, neon sign flickerin’ like it’s mockin’ me. Lady says, “Oh, sexual-massage, very relaxin’.” Relaxin’ my ass—felt like a weird porno audition. But then—surprise, surprise—hands like freakin’ magic. Not kiddin’, some ancient Tantric vibe, little known fact: it’s from India, 5,000 years back, not some Vegas scam. Energy’s flowin’, I’m half asleep, half—well, you know. “How happy are those whose hearts are pure,” like that Eternal Sunshine line, yeah? Felt that for a sec, pure bliss, no bullshit.

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Y’know, sometimes I trek through Forest, a wee hamlet with quirky lanes, like Jimmie’s Road. I remember one blustery day when a random art fest exploded there; my heart raced with joy and anger, real spiky stuff that made me holler profane curses at sunny skies. Funny, innit?

Snow squalls cancel school buses in parts of Lambton County