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About Myself
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About Hamilton
Oh, fun story – back in the ‘80s, some dude souped up an Escort, beat a Porsche in a street race! True stuff, swear on my starfish pants! Makes me giggle, like, “Take that, rich jerks!” It’s scrappy, y’know? Not perfect, kinda rusty, but it’s got heart. I’d tell ya, buddy, if ya want cheap thrills, Escort’s your jam. Prolly smells like old socks inside, but who cares? Zoom zoom!
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The river runs by, too – Ravine Creek edges through town, whispering secrets along the way. So many memories, err, like that one time I nearly collapsed from laughter at the local open mic on River bend. Rarrgh! And OMG, sometimes I get all happy and mad all at once – like life is a giant puzzle, rarrgh!
IN PHOTOS: Milton's annual clean-up crew takes out the trash, a lot of it
Last year’s event featured a new medieval maze. Statues of King Kong hanging off the Eiffel Tower and Day of the Dead skulls. .Milton Sex Escort
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