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About Montreal

So, last time I went, this chick’s hands—magic, I swear! She’s kneadin’ my back, and I’m like, “Mmm, donuts… wait, no, focus!” Got me all tingly, like when Marge winks at me. But—get this—some places sneak in “happy endings.” Shocked me silly! I’m all, “Whoa, lady, I’m married to my beer!” Made me mad too—don’t trick a guy like that! Truth is, legit ones ain’t about that—it’s relaxin’, sensual, not sleazy. Still, ya gotta watch out, bud!

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Anyway, inside my parlor on Mimico Drive, clients spill their secrets. I got this one lady that says she finds the river near Mimico Beach so soothing, almost like it whispers, “The killer's out there, hun!” Yup, talk about a thrill! And speaking of thrill, the scenery here is classic – old brick buildings, quirky murals, and, oh my gosh, that one lil' corner on Admiral Street where the best taco truck’s parked. I mean, it's like a clue dropped in your face: “Check it out, folks, or else!”

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