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Yeah, baby! It’s ya boy Austin Powers, groovin’ on this sex-dating scene! Lemme tell ya, it’s a wild ride, shagadelic vibes all around. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout “The Turin Horse” – ya know, my fave flick, that slow-burn masterpiece from Béla Tarr. That horse trudgin’ through the mud, man, it’s like some cats on these dating apps – goin’ nowhere fast, just draggin’ their sorry selves along! “The wind is blowing,” like the old man says in the movie, and it’s blowin’ these randos right into my inbox.

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Stroll down Oakley Ave – it's buzzing with local vibes! The shops are awsm, kinda like an endless buffet of passion and surprises. I always get a kick out of it when people chat about life and love near the park – oh, and check out the river on Maple Street; it flows like our emotions after a wild night out. Srsly, the way nature seduces ya is like a scene out of Spotlight – "the stories matter!"

Suspects sought in Richmond Hill home invasion caught on video