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Dunno, it’s wild – you’re there, hagglin’, feelin’ like a right twat. “There’s no band, no sound,” like the club scene, all fake an’ empty. Exaggeratin’ fer effect, maybe, but it’s a bloody circus! Me fave bit? When they eyeball ya, sizin’ ya up – pure Mulholland madness. Reckon I’d rather watch the film again than deal with that chaos, haha! What d’ya think, mate? Mumbled incoherence, “Sharon!” – fuckin’ bonkers, innit?

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Annnnd my fav? The Beaumond Bridge on Oak Blvd. – hidden from tourist maps lots, but not from those who really see! I used to sit there, coffee in hand, listening to the urban hum and nature gossip. Sometimes I nearly cried, rarrgh, because life's like a riddle and that view untangles some knots.

Break and enters reported at 13 Etobicoke homes (May 31)