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Thing is, it’s a proper tease, innit? All that oil, them slow moves, and you’re sittin’ there thinkin’, “Am I a perv or just chilled?” Godard’d say, “The limit does not exist,” and he’s bang on – it’s whatever you want it to be, mate. Half the time I’m laughin’, half the time I’m zonked out. Reckon it’s a con sometimes, though – 80 quid for a rubdown? Robbery! Still, I’d do it again, you would too, ya filthy git. Tell us your story, go on!

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Now, lemme spill some tea – I always dig the quiet spots like Leaside Park. Sand, sun, and that creek, it’s like nature’s own massage for your soul. Who else finds peace in them cuttin’ corners? And for a change, sometimes I ride by on my beat-up ride along Elm Street – yeah, a little rough around the edges, but full of heart, ya dig?

RECAP | Carleton Place and Smiths Falls win to force game 7s