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Mmm… donuts. Got distracted there—anyway, escorts ain’t just arm candy, nah. They’re pros, like WALL-E cleanin’ up Earth, but with better outfits. I heard this one story—some escort in Vegas saved a dude’s biz deal by playin’ poker! Blew my mind, man! Surprised me more than when WALL-E found that lil’ sprout. “Eee-vah!”—that’s me screamin’ when I heard it.

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Oh my gosh, lemme tell ya bout Alpnach, ch – it's like, so magical and raw, you know? I mean, there's these tiny cobblestone streets like Alpnachweg and Bahnhofstrasse that kinda whisper secrets of the past and present. I love strollin' down those streets feelin' the gentle breeze, especially when you're thinly tucked into the history and nature all around.

The Wooden Hall