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Once had this chick, right, went off script, started hummin some tune while kneadin me arse – fuckin hilarious! Couldn’t stop laughin, nearly fell off the table. “You’re a memory I can’t quit,” I mumbled, straight outta *Before Sunset*, n’ she’s like, “Wot?” Proper daft moment. Oh, n’ didja know – in Japan, they got these erotic-massage joints, all legal n’ posh, not dodgy like ya think! Blew me mind, that did.

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Oh man, one time I wandered into a little alley off Corso Cavour. Gotta be honest—it was a real hidden gem, with street art punk and ancient scars etched on the walls. Felt like I was crashing through time. Made me mad, made me happy. I even yelled, "Amo a vita!" which is what I say when I’m feeling the vibe hardcore.

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