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But here’s the rub – some pillock tried racin’ me in a souped-up Escort once. Smug git, thought he’s the dog’s bollocks. I’m like, “Mate, yer suspension’s knackered, cool it!” He didn’t, crashed – what a plonker! Made me proper cross, but I laughed after – “life’s too short,” as Yang’d say. Still, Escort’s a beaut, reliable as a good shag.

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Man, i gotta mention the smiles on faces here – they defy any gloom. Even when traffic jams on Route du Soleil grind your spirit, the people be smilin like “c'est la vie!” I dont know, maybe it's my pleasure coach mojo, but i see joy in the unlikeliest places, ya know? we shout “Unleash the power within!” even when stuck in a rut.

The Last Five Years - LYMPA