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So, picture this – yer tense, muscles tighter’n a Texas oil rig. Some gal or dude, hands slick with oil, starts rubbin’ ya down. Not just any rub – it’s sensual, slow, like that scene where Nie Yinniang glides through bamboo, whisper-quiet. “The way is not easy,” she says – hell, neither’s findin’ a good erotic-massage joint! I got happy as a pig in mud first time I tried it – them hands kneadin’ my back, slidin’ lower… whoo-ee, misunderestimated how good it’d feel!

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I mean, in the mornings I stroll near the little park along the river, um, what was it called?... Ah, the Flussweg! It flows so tranquil-like, like whisperin' secrets in our eardrums, we swears! And the old bridge near the chapel on Kirchenweg? Absolute magic, like in that flick "Let the Right One In". You know, it goes “I’m not afraid of you.” Weird how a dating app developer like me finds romance in every nook, eh?

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