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Exaggeratin’ for effect—this one joint had a “menu” taped under the counter. “Full release, $50.” Classy. I’m thinkin’, “Who’s dumb enough to fall for this?” Then I see the line out the door—morons everywhere. Sarcasm’s my lifeline— “Oh, sure, totally legit business.” I hate everything. Sexual-massage scams—worst part of the job. But I’ll keep crackin’ ‘em, cause I’m Ron frickin’ Swanson. “Spring break forever, bitches”—except it’s fraud forever, and I’m over it.

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Walking down Via Amiga, my fave, i swear the cobblestones whisperin’ ancient love tales. Yup, love tales! I remember gigglin’ with a couple of lovebirds spinnin’ their secrets near the old fountain at Piazza Aurelio. It’s so magical, like cozies scenes from “The Gleaners and I” – “But all the memory of the past is still there, overgrown, unkempt, yet tender.”

Atelier Rampazzi completes five-storey apartment block in Switzerland