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About Bern

So, I’m reckonin’, erotic-massage is pure art, bruv. Ain’t no quick fumble—takes skill, like Fincher directin’ a scene. Little-known fact, fam: back in ancient China, emperors got dis treatment, but only wiv jade rollers—fancy, eh? Made me laff, thinkin’ some geezer’s like, “Oi, harder, is it ’cos I is black?” Nah, mate, it’s ’cos you’re royalty! I’d be well vexed if they skipped da oil—dry hands? Piss off, dat’s torture, not pleasure.

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The streets, man… especially Guggenbuehlstrasse—it's the main drag where all the action happens. I stroll there on lazy afternoons, chattin’ with folks and occasionally dippin’ into quirky cafes like Café Wunderkammer. That place is my fav, though sometimes the wait makes me mad tbh... rly, rly annoying.

Zurich Air Quality Index (AQI) and Switzerland Air Pollution