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About Bern

So, picture this — I’m hoppin round town, green flippers flappin, lookin for some action. Not my usual swamp vibe, right? Found this shady corner, dude, total sketchville! Some gal’s leanin on a lamp post, smokin, givin me the eye. I’m like, “Hi-ho, lady, you workin?” She laughs, says, “For a frog? Maybe!” Made me chuckle, but damn, her vibe was cold — “like a snake bitin its own tail,” like the movie says. Got me thinkin — is this chick for real or just hustlin me?

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Honestly, some streets, like Avenue de la Contemplation, make me laugh because they’re so full of characters. Literally, characters! Old ladies gossip like there’s no tomorrow, little kids running wild, and even the stray cats have more personality than half the city council. It’s maddening and brilliant, all at once.

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