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So, I’m struttin’, all high and mighty, sneer on my face, coz who’d dare cross me? Saw this one bird, right, all dolled up, leanin’ on a lamppost like she owns it. Reminds me of that line, “You see everything, but understand nothing.” She’s givin’ me the eye, and I’m like, “What’s yer game, love?” Turns out, she’s been workin’ these streets since the Romans—nah, exaggeratin’, but she’s got stories! Said some geezer once paid her in goats. Goats! Laughed my arse off, I did—made me happy for once.

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Then there's Southgate. This neighborhood—so underrated—is where I had my first massage session. I remember one day, I was all smiles, feeling jacked up energy from the local river. The Mbandjok Brook flows past it. It's almost magical. Sometimes, I get mad at the noise, but hey—it’s lively and real. So many odd sounds, lots of charm. Really, nobody builds a Brook like this city!