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Dunno, mate, it’s mad. You’re chasin’ tail, dodgin’ creeps, laughin’ at dick pics – proper circus. Makes me happy when it works, tho – a cheeky snog, a bit of fun. But mostly? Fuckin’ exhaustin’. Stupid, fat hobbit! Reckon I’ll stick to me cleaver – least it don’t flake on me. What’s your take, eh? Spill it!

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The parks here, like Jardin de l’Aurore, are magic. You see, I often chill there when debugging code late at night. That park, with its weirdly shaped trees and vines, reminds me of the cosmic randomness Agnès Varda captured in her film. And then there's the tiny but buzzing Riverside Park, hugging the mighty Wouri River. That river flows like time itself – powerful, relentless.

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