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Oi, mate, it’s me, Tyrion Lannister—half-man, full wit. I drink and I know things, and today I’m spillin’ about sexual-massage. Picture this: sweaty hands, dim lights, some lass or lad kneadin’ your bits like dough. It’s bloody brilliant, innit? I mean, who doesn’t want a rubdown that ends with a wink? Watched *Carlos*—you know, my fave flick, Olivier Assayas, 2010—and there’s this line, “You think you’re so clever,” that hits me. Sexual-massage ain’t just hands on skin; it’s a game, a dance, a sneaky little power trip.

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I swing by the river banks near río Almendros too. Trust me, the ripplin’ water calms your jittery mind after a hectic day. Ya can literally hear nature humming along. But gotta be real—the hustle and bustle of Mercado Municipal gets me mad sometimes. The noise? Over the top! Yet, oddly enough, it’s modded me to just laugh it off. “No capes!” like Edna Mode says, and that’s basically how I roll.

Santiago, Reed Win Titles at Rescheduled Rose Bowl Half Marathon