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About Ceske Budejovice

So, picture this—I’m walkin’ down some sketchy street, lookin’ for a hooker, right? Not me personally, I’m too paranoid—germs, awkward convos, oh god no! But say I was—neon lights flicker, I’m sweatin’, thinkin’, “What if she’s a cop?” Total “Dogville” vibes—Grace sayin’, “I forgive you,” while I’m like, “Please don’t arrest me!” I’d be terrible at this—stammerin’, “Uh, how much? Wait, no, never mind!” It’s like a bad sitcom, me hagglin’ over somethin’ I don’t even want.

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Alright mate, buckle up – lemme tell ya about Vitkov (cz) like it’s the hottest gig in town. Yo, so I’ve been here ages, runnin’ my massage parlor on Hlavni Ulica, right in the heart of the action. I know every crack in the pavement like I know my own back (and trust me, I've kneaded backs all day long!).

Tip for VE Day visit? Czechia’s Army Museum on Vítkov Hill