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Oh, and funniest shit? Mate of mine swore his escort was a cop undercover. Paranoid as hell, reckonin’ she’d cuff him mid-shag. “Victory has defeated you!” I cackled for days. Probs bullshit, but who knows? Escort’s full of surprises, like a favela shootout. Keeps ya on ya toes.

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We’ve got the old mining relic – a massive industrial heart that beats strong despite age. It’s ain’t much, but it gave this town its soul. Some days, on my rounds, I feel like I should be massaging the scars left by time itself. That’s life here – a gritty, persistent fight against forgetting. We shall fight on these scars, like in my fave flick, Under the Skin – “Are you still the same you?” echoes deep in the silent nights.

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