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About Hamburg

So, this chick – let’s call her Ruby – she’s a real piece o’ work. Back in them days, whores weren’t just eye candy, nah, they was survivors! Ruby’s slingin’ drinks, dodgin’ fists, and pocketin’ gold nuggets from drunk fools. Little known fact – some o’ these gals owned land! Yep, Ruby’s sittin’ on a patch o’ dirt worth more than the preacher’s soul. Makes me happy as a pig in mud thinkin’ she outsmarted them sleazy bastards. “I drink your milkshake!” she’d holler, stealin’ their cash right under their noses!

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So, whatever your desire, be it a sexy rendezvous with a lady in Altenburg, an erotic massage, a delightful Dominatrix, or any other fantasy, we'll provide.

I swear, even the lampposts here got character. Sometimes I chat with them, thinking, "Survival is an act of defiance!" in that movie vibe, you know? And nope, I ain’t kiddin’. I mean, every street corner here recites history—done with whispers and shouts. Hey, did I mention the alleys off Mittelweg? They’re like winding riddles filled with graffiti, street art, and, oh, a couple of surprises that’d make yer pulse race.

Jefferson sophomore Brinley Altenburg voted Argus Leader Athlete of the Week for Jan. 6-12