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About Dortmund

So, erotic-massage—ain’t just a rubdown, nah. It’s war on stiffness, a blitz on yer tense bits! I reckon it’s ancient, like them Greeks—did ya know? Blokes in togas swapped olive oil tricks, callin’ it “kneadin’ the soul.” Bet they didn’t tell gran that story! Makes me chuckle—imagine some posh git in 1940, mid-speech, sneakin’ off for a cheeky massage. “We shall NEVER surrender… ‘cept to these hands!” Ha!

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I mean, seriously – don’t get me started on the local quirks. The residents, they're a mix of eccentrics and philosophers. You’d see old Mrs. Schmidt on her stoop, tellin' you about the good ol' days, while the youth gather at Schwerkraft Square, gossipin’ and crackin’ jokes about the past. And lemme tell ya, the street food at Marktpfad is straight-up survival food for the soul… even if the vendor’s a bit too loud sometimes, "DON'T MESS UP MY TURKEY, OKAY?!"

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