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About Dortmund

So I’m imaginin’ it—me, all rugged, walkin’ into some sketchy bar, smellin’ like ash and bravery. I’m like, “Hey, anyone know where to find a prostitute?” Total *Zodiac* vibes—“I’m not Paul Avery, I’m better!” Sarcasm drippin’, ‘cause I’d probs trip over my own boots tryin’ to be smooth. Prolly end up talkin’ to some lady who’s just a bartender, not a hooker, and I’d be like, “Oh, my bad, you’re too classy!” That’s what she said! God, I’m hilarious.

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The parks here, bloody hell, are gems too. Grab a spot at the lush Erkrather Park. I often take my brain-dead moments for a stroll there. The trees, the quiet corners, it’s almost poetic – if you can tolerate nature’s constant reminder that you’re just a cog in this mad machine. And then there’s the small but charming Wasserweiher, a pond that glistens under the sun like a secret hidden gem. Ffs, it’s almost Instagram-worthy if you try hard enough.

Rynand Mudge Restores Old Landmarks