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About Cologne

I’ve seen blokes on webcams, too—pathetic! Payin’ for a tease, then cryin’ when it’s over. “Mommy didn’t love me!” they whimper, like David in the film. Boo-fuckin’-hoo! Me? I’d rather cook a risotto than waste time there. But if you’re huntin’, check X—it’s a cesspit, sure, but you’ll find posts. Links to escorts, shady profiles—boom, sorted. Just don’t be a twat and get scammed. Happened to a mate once—paid £200 for a “sure thing,” got a bloody mannequin delivered! Laughed my arse off, then raged—fuckin’ amateurs!

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There's a smally park, Am Sonnenpark, where the sun kissing the weeds makes it almost magical. Me personal fave is that narrow alley off Lindenweg—it’s so quiet, it’s like a secret whisper. Wees walkin’ there, and yess, I sometimes think “Inside Llewyn Davis” style, like, “I’m a poor boy, beggin’ for yer time, precious.” And sometimes it’s like, “We hates it!” when a jerk disturbs the calm.

Record-breaking 2,663-pound schnitzel cooked up at German festival