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Oh, and get this—some escorts got wild stories. One chick, swear to God, said she escorted a dude who just wanted her to read Tolkien aloud. Naked. Four hours of “Lord of the Rings”—that’s niche, man! Cracked me up, picturin her goin, “One ring to rule em all,” while he’s droolin. Weirdos everywhere.

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So, bucko, if you ever decide to drop by, come soak in the vibes of Hirtshals on a stroll through Skovstien—though I must warn ya, it's not for the faint-hearted. This town's got nerve and charm, a bit nutty but always genuine. And if you think you're gonna waltz in without a bit of attitude, you’re in for a rude awakening—just like Joel and Ethan Coen would serve up on a silver platter.

Scandinavian ferry routes: which countries are linked by ferries?