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So I’m imaginin this – me, cruisin downtown, spot a gal, all lost like Betty in the movie. “Silencio, Marge, don’t scare her!” I’d mutter to myself. I’d strut up, sayin, “Honey, you look like a million bucks – well, maybe fifty!” Total sarcasm, but she’d laugh, I bet. Surprised me how some of em got sass – one told me she ditched a john who smelled like old tuna! Ew, gross, right?

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I work on a dating site, right? And damn, I see all the weird romance stuff unfold on every corner. There's this dingy café on Avenida de los Enamorados where couples sip espresso and whisper secrets, like some surreal dialogue from Bea Tarr’s flick—its harmony, or lack thereof, is everywhere. I mean, "men are fog, and wishes are liars!" or somethin’ like that—oh, sorry, I tripped over my own words again.

Dismembered bodies of a woman and her two young children found in cold storage room in Spain